On a Lighter Note

Possibly, someone else has already done this, or something like it. I haven't seen anything yet, but I have missed Cobert Report for the last few nights. so, if this isn't original, it's by accident.

Growing up, many of us under the age of eighty were taught that there were nine planets in our solar system. Now, the International Astronomers Union tells us that the ninth planet, "Pluto," is not a real planet, but a "dwarf" planet, little more than an asteroid. This demonstrates the Bush administration's failure to recognize equality among all planets. The ACLU should immediately bring a lawsuit against the administration to ensure that Pluto is given equal and fair treatment among the other planets. Bush should be impeached for grabbing power from Congress in deciding what is and what is not a fully recognized planet.
If Pluto doesn't feel inferior, Congress should enact legislation to make sure it does, such as creating a program that implies that Pluto can never be equal to the other planets without huge amounts of bureaucracy to "help" it step up to the status of the other planets.
But, who is to say that these "planets" actually exist? We can't see them, so how do we know that they are there? Planets were invented by the Bush administration to grab more money from the taxpayer to satisfy his buddies in the oil industry.
If Pluto does actually exist, however, what right do the neocons have to say if it is the ninth planet or not? Why do we even have to number the planets in the first place, making Venus number "two," placing her in an inferior rank to the opressive alpha male Mercury, which is ranked #1. No planet should be made to feel inferior. We citizens should step up and demand that our elected officials take action on this matter.